April is the cruelest month and all that

Though I am feeling better, I am now so preoccupied with work and other things that I won’t be blogging again until Monday.  Monday will mark the start of a new month, and I hope a return to regular blogging. After such a long hiatus, I will have to earn back a whole new crop of readers, I imagine!

Students, I assure you I am well and will be healthy for your classes next week.  I’ll also have all of your midterms with me!

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Still sick

I’ve had to cancel another day’s worth of classes, as I am still dealing with one very upset tummy!

I always feel guilty cancelling classes without prior notice, even though I know that most students rejoice when they see the little "class cancelled" notices posted on the door!   When I’ve got a scheduled cancellation, my students can make other plans, but I always hate thinking of students making a long trip to campus for nothing.  I also hate thinking about what I will have to cut out of the syllabus as a result!

I’m getting better at being able to sit at the computer, and may be able to have another post up later today.

Thursday Short Poem: Williams’ “Her News”

I’ve been putting up Thursday Short Poems for nigh on three years now, and though I tend to prefer contemporary poets, I haven’t had anything up by Hugo Williams.  This is odd, if only because those of us graced with this finest of first names (particularly outside the Spanish-speaking world) are few and far between.  As a matter of solidarity, I put up one of the better known of his poems — and my favorite.  The theme reminds me of a time in my life when I did have moments akin to what Williams describes here, back when I was a somewhat different Hugo.

Her News

You paused for a moment and I heard you smoking
on the other end of the line.
I pictured your expression,
one eye screwed shut against the smoke
as you waited for my reaction.
I was waiting for it myself, a list of my own news
gone suddenly cold in my hand.
Supposing my wife found out, what would happen then?
Would I have to leave her and marry you now?
Perhaps it wouldn’t be so bad,
starting again with someone new, finding a new place,
pretending the best was yet to come.
It might even be fun,
playing the family man, walking around in the park
full of righteous indignation.
But no, I couldn’t go through all that again,
not without my own wife being there,
not without her getting cross about everything.

Perhaps she wouldn’t mind about the baby,
then we could buy a house in the country
and all move in together.
That sounded like a better idea.
Now that I’d been caught at last, a wave of relief
swept over me. I was just considering
a shed in the garden with a radio and a day bed,
when I remembered I hadn’t seen you for over a year.
"Congratulations," I said. "When’s it due?"

I spent about fifteen years of my life "getting caught at last" and having successive waves of relief sweep over me.  How nice not to have those moments anymore — and yet, every once in a great while, I miss the drama…

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Fighting off the bug

I had hoped that I would be able to make it back from Colombia without bringing back a nasty bug; in 2003, on our first visit, I came home with a dreadful case of giardia.  I was fine yesterday in the first few hours after arriving home, but last night became violently ill.  No hospital trip, just the usual unpleasantnesses. It’s only now, at just before 4:00PM, that I’m up and showered and feeling somewhat civilized.

To my students in my Wednesday classes, I apologize for another missed day.  And to my readers, I promise to be posting again relatively soon.

A call for submissions on domestic violence

Jen from Smith College (and host of Righteous Revolution) posts the following call:

A project I’m working on for a class (and which may end up being much further-reaching than the halls of Smith College, and longer-lasting than that of a final project):

Disclaimer: If submitting your story will in any way put you in danger, please do not attempt to do so until you can ensure your own safety.

I am in the process of creating a compilation blog to illustrate the various intersections of identity and societal influences that play a role in the differing experiences of domestic violence (including physical, sexual, emotional, or similar kinds of abuse). Instead of the largely white, heterosexual, middle-class stories of domestic violence that dominates the sphere of knowledge, this blog project will include a truly diverse array of experiences. Domestic violence is not limited to white/heterosexual/middle-class populations, and neither is this project.

I am therefore sending out a call for submissions. If you have been a victim of domestic violence (as defined, for the purposes of this project, above), or have been directly involved in another person’s experience of DV, and wish to speak out about your experiences, please email your submission to: speakup(dot)speakout(at)yahoo(dot)com

There are no style or length limitations. The one request I have is this: in order to aid in the reader’s (and my) understanding of your experience of DV, I would appreciate if you included your location in the world – e.g. a general geographic region, gender identity, sexual orientation, cultural background, etc. Feel free to include as few or as many locators as you wish.

The deadline for submissions is: Monday, May 1, 2006.

More detailed information about the project is available at the blog: Speaking Up, Speaking Out… Against Domestic Violence. If you have further questions, feel free to email me at the address listed above.

My understanding is that men are welcome to submit to this project, but please don’t use Jen’s project as a soap box for challenging the whole notion of domestic violence. Submissions need not all be from feminists, of course, but they ought not to openly hostile to feminism.

Colombia gets safer, and Hugo gets over romantic illusions about insurgents

It’s been an exhausting but happy couple of weeks.  Since I was last on campus, my wife and I have flown through seven different airports,spent quality time with both our families, and surprisingly enough, had the chance to sleep eight hours straight several nights in a row. 

We spent the past week with my wife’s mother’s family on their remote, rural finca (ranch) in Cesar province in northwest Colombia.  It was our third visit to Colombia together, and our first as a married couple.  Since I’m tired and lightheaded this morning, I’ll offer some random thoughts.  I hope to have photos up by the end of the week!

First off, almost as much as a good lefty likes me hates to admit it, even I can see how much Colombia has improved in recent years under the leadership of President Bush’s only true friend in South America, Colombian President Alvaro Uribe.  The right-wing Uribe was elected in 2002 on a hardline platform of no compromise with Marxist guerrillas and drug traffickers.  Many feared a dramatic escalation of violence in what was already one of the most dangerous countries (if not the most dangerous) in the Western Hemisphere.  But in many regions, security has clearly markedly improved.

My wife, my mother-in-law, and I all agree that things had improved noticeably in the mere 20 months since we were last in Colombia.  The main highway that leads from Bucaramanga (the city with the nearest airport) north to the finca had been repaved and cleaned up.  Most of the potholes that we saw in 2004 were filled in.  The number of army checkpoints in Santander, Norte de Santander, and Cesar (the three provinces in which we spend most of our time on our Colombia trips) had been clearly reduced.  Last time, we were ordered out of the car several times to have our papers checked and to be frisked for weapons.  That didn’t happen once on this visit.

The small towns near my wife’s family’s finca all showed signs of increasing stability and prosperity.  In Pelaya, Costilla, Aguachica, we saw new streetlights up, new paved roads, and fewer soldiers.   We saw more new cars.  (Speaking of cars, almost everyone in this region of Colombia drives Renaults; for years, they were the only brand available in the northwest provinces, and even now, they retain considerable loyalty.)  We discovered too that people were more willing to discuss politics than they had been in the past; there was a clear reduction in the amount of palpable fear that folks seem to have.  In the poor and simple farming communities in which we spent our time, we found surprising (to me) support for the hardline, conservative policies of Alvaro Uribe.  Everyone in my wife’s family is planning to support him in his reelection bid next month, grateful as they are for his refusal to compromise with the narco-traffickers and the guerrillas who have tormented them.

I confess I grew up romanticizing left-wing revolutionaries and guerrilla groups.   In the 1980s, as a teenage socialist, I became enchanted with the Sandinistas in Nicaragua.  (It all started, of course, with a sublimely good Clash album).  I became a fan of Fidel and Daniel Ortega and the FMLN; I had the ubiquitous ratty Che Guevara t-shirt.  I loved the idea that not so far away from my comfortable home on the California coast, men and women were marching through the jungle, fighting the capitalist oppressors and liberating the poor campesinos.  In more recent years, my adolescent radicalism faded into limousine liberalism, but I still made appreciative noises about armed Marxist insurgencies wherever they were in the Third World.

While I had daydreams of revolution, my wife’s family had many very real and very brutal experiences with the FARC (the left-wing guerrilla army that has been trying to take over Colombia for decades) and with the right-wing paramilitaries who combated them.  For years, my wife’s uncle (who owns the little finca) was forced to pay protection money to the guerrillas.  Indeed, when we visited in August 2004, the FARC was still quite active in the hills very near the family place.  In order to guarantee our protection, my wife’s uncle paid the guerrillas a substantial "head tax" (in cattle) for each of us.  This was to ensure our safety during our visit; had he not paid it, the guerrillas made it clear that we would risk being kidnapped.   My wife’s family only told us about this head tax after we returned to the States — it was a sobering realization, and one of many that put an end to my fantasies about the moral superiority of armed insurgents.

And then there was Matteo, a skinny and lovable mutt who looked a lot like a lab/doberman/retriever mix.  Matteo has been guarding the finca for years, and he has the bullet wound and the machete slashes to show for it.  It’s funny how dense and sentimental we privileged types can be!  I can listen to stories of people I’ve never met getting abducted and killed and be unfazed — but show me very real wounds on a very real animal and I become instantly enraged!   Listening to the story of how Matteo survived a brutal slashing a year of two ago at the hands of the FARC left me shaking with anger and close to tears.  And any last shred of sympathy for the cause or the tactics of the guerrillas vanished last week.  And even more bizarrely, I come home rooting lustily for President Uribe to win a second term in office! 

You see, since the president stepped up his military campaign against the insurgents (a campaign backed by considerable infusions of cash from the USA), my wife’s family — my family — has felt safer.   No one asked for a head tax this time.  No one has shot at Matteo in over a year.  We walked the streets in broad daylight fearlessly, and my uncle-in-law didn’t have to sell a dozen cows to give us the right to do so.  That’s worth something.  Yes, I understand that Uribe’s human rights record is less than perfect; yes, I understand that the left-wing press on which I normally rely to form my world-view is deeply hostile towards him for a variety of reasons.  But I’ve been to Colombia three times now, and I’ve seen very, very real progress for a great many very vulnerable and poor people — and whether the press in this country reports it or not, I’m going to believe what I’ve seen and experienced more than what I read.

Colombia is still not a safe country by the standards of the prosperous global North.  It still has a high murder rate, and the guerrillas and narco-traffickers remain active in certain parts of the country.  But it is clearly getting safer, and is starting to become the sort of place adventurous  American tourists could consider visiting more often.  Last night, we flew home on COPA Airlines, flying from Bogota to Panama City and then home to LAX.  Very few Americans on the first leg of the flight leaving Colombia, but tons on the second leg back from Central America; lots of sunburned folks heading home from a week in Panama or Costa Rica or on the islands of the southern Caribbean.  Colombia, of course, is the closest South American country to the West Coast of the USA — it’s only an hour’s worth of flying time beyond Costa Rica.  It also offers infinitely more biological and anthropological and cultural diversity than the small Central American nations that have become popular with US tourists; Colombia has the mountains, the beaches, the lowlands and the dazzling metropolises.  What it doesn’t have is a reputation as a top tourist destination (outside, perhaps, of the walled city of Cartagena.)   If things keep getting safer and more secure, that might change.

Blogging to resume!

Well, I’m home.  It’s just past 7:00 in the morning, and I’m back in the office on campus cruising along on three hours sleep.  Our flight home from Colombia did not land at LAX until midnight last night, and by the time we’d gotten home and settled in for bed, it was close to three.

I’ll post more about our trip in a bit. I came home to more than 100 email messages (after I deleted the spam), and that will take some time to wade through. I’ll also try and go through some of the comments, as it seems that things may have gotten out of hand again. I can say this: mentioning the name of the accuser in the Duke Lacrosse case will get you instantly and permanently banned.  Turning the comments below this post into a discussion of the ethics of naming the victims in rape cases will also earn my ire, and at the very least, such comments will be rapidly deleted.

It’s good to be back.

Spring hiatus

Well, folks, this blog and I are heading on to spring vacation.  I am eager to recharge, and I feel as if I’ve been getting repetitive lately around here.  I’m going to take two weeks off, my wife and I are going to do some traveling, and I’ll have a full report when I’m back.  Look for posting to resume on Tuesday, April 25.

I’ll be away from the computer at times, so emails may not be promptly returned.  I’ll check in from time to time.

Be courteous and kind in my comments section, and a wonderful Passover and Happy Easter to everyone.

A short note on feminist flirting

Over at Bitch Ph.D. there’s a post on feminist men and flirting. It’s attracted lots of interesting comments.  Here’s from the original post:

In general, it seems to me that while flirting is difficult for everyone, that feminist women–made confident in part because of feminism–have it better, right now, than sensitive-to-feminism men. (We are not discussing jerky guys, or jerky girls, although I have theories about them too, but no time to elaborate. Perhaps later in comments.) There are lots of accessible models for sex-positive feminism; but I see fewer (none?) for sex-positive masculinity. I think that men who like women, and who don’t want to buy into the all-too-prevalent role of the fratty guy or the "nice guy" don’t really know how to proceed, especially given that we still, unfortunately, tend to assume that it’s the male’s resposibility to initiate. And even for a woman who is willing to initiate, the diffidence of men who aren’t sure what their role is can be offputting. So how do genuinely nice men and feminist women hook up?

Well, gosh.  I don’t really flirt these days with anyone other than my wife. But it hasn’t been that long since I was "out there", as it were, so I’ll offer some quick thoughts on the topic.  At the risk of getting my pro-feminist Christian credentials pulled yet again,let me say that when single, I never had any qualms about flirting in at least some fairly traditional ways.  Good flirtation always struck me as being about finding clever ways to say to someone "I notice you".  I remember having an argument about this with a male feminist friend of mine. He argued that the kind of "noticing" I was talking about (a subtle response to mutual attraction) was really just about reinforcing old gender roles.  "I’ve seen you flirt", he told me, and "it’s hard to tell you’re a feminist when you do it."

Yes, he really said that.  And I really burst out laughing.  I’m sorry, there’s a feminist way to flirt?  Or better yet, a pro-feminist way not to flirt?  Now I’m not "sex-positive" in the usual use of the term (I hold fairly conservative views on sexual behavior, am virulently anti-porn, etc).  But I  was always very "flirt-positive", even though I now generally direct that flirtation towards one person!   What I told my friend — and what I tell the young men I work with — is that there is nothing shameful about being sexually attracted to women.  Furthermore, there isn’t anything inherently wrong with using traditional flirting methods to express that attraction; where feminism kicks in is in reminding young men that a clear signal to cease and desist needs to be respected at once.  But the idea that a pro-feminist man will only be attracted to a woman’s mind without some appreciation of physical attraction is entirely absurd.

So how do genuinely nice men and feminist women hook up?  One of Bitch’s commenters said she’d never found it to be a problem, and was now wondering why.  And I suppose I’ll have to agree, and say it was never a problem for me either.  (Some who know me and love me anyway would point out that I haven’t always been that nice a man).    But I know it is a problem for some of the young pro-feminist men I work with.  Flirting, like so many other things, is a difficult art to describe in words.  In my life, so much of it seemed based on tone, inflection, eye contact, and physical chemistry.  But one thing is clear — good flirting always involves confidence and fun; feminism always involves mutual respect and good listening.  I’m quite confident all of that can go together nicely!