Friday Random Ten: soundtrack for a flu-ridden Friday

I started coming down with the flu on Tuesday, and it’s thrown a serious wrench in my plans to run a marathon on Sunday. Unless I feel ooodles better in the next few hours, I’m not going to be able to do it. I’ll make a final decision when I wake up tomorrow morning.

So home on the couch, with this very random collection produced by shuffling the Ipod.

1. “Wind and Rain”, Crooked Still
2. “The Year that Clayton Delaney Died”, Tom T. Hall
3. “Safe to Land”, Jars of Clay
4. “Sin City”, The Kennedys
5. “Malibu”, Hole
6. “Teen for God”, Dar Williams
7. “Tracks of My Tears”, Billy Bragg
8. “The Beautiful Ones”, Prince and the Revolution
9. “The Times You’ve Come”, Jackson Browne
10. “If I Had a Hammer”, Sam Cooke

Bonus Track: “These Thousand Hills”, Third Day

Prop 8, boycotts, and villains who aren’t villains

Nine days after the election, the reaction to the narrow passage of Proposition 8 — eliminating the right of same-sex couples to marry in California — continues to build. Major demonstrations are planned at city halls across the state this Saturday, and a series of grassroots organizations have sprung up to work to overturn this decision. Some advocate a complex appeal to the state Supreme Court, arguing that the voters overreached. (The explanation of how that might work is here). Others talk of another initiative in 2010, accompanied by far better outreach to minority communities and other groups who were neglected by the campaign against Proposition 8. My students are galvanized and excited; when the happy day arrives that gay marriage is restored in California, this time for good, we may well come to see this defeat as a “blessing in disguise.” But it’s far too early for that sort of reflection; the pain now is real and the work is great.

Many of my students and colleagues are involved in organizing boycotts of those companies which supported Proposition 8. Others, such as Roseanne, are urging a broader boycott of every organization which has large numbers of Mormons on its executive payroll. (The Mormon church gave heavily to the “Yes on 8″ campaign). I cannot support that effort.

I make a clear distinction between boycotting a company that takes a public stand in favor of marriage inequality and boycotting a company which may have certain employees or executives who have given privately to support Proposition 8. It would be hard to think of many large companies that don’t have social conservatives on their payroll somewhere, including folks who use some of their pay to contribute to political causes that I regard as discriminatory. Google and Apple both gave major donations to the anti Prop. 8 campaign, and their CEOs (Page, Brin, Jobs) are all staunch supporters of marriage equality. But it’s likely that somewhere, even in San Francisco or Silicon Valley, these major companies have well-compensated employees whose views and donations are diametrically opposed to those of their bosses.

Boycotts have their place; one need think only of Montgomery, Alabama, to be reminded that the conscious decision to withhold financial support for public or private entities is a powerful tool in the arsenal of justice-building. But indiscriminate boycotts have their limits, and I am sure I was not the only progressive pained by the story of Scott Eckern.

Scott Eckern, artistic director for the California Musical Theatre, resigned Wednesday as a growing number of artists threatened to boycott the organization because of his $1,000 donation to the campaign to ban gay marriage in California.

“I understand my supporting of Proposition 8 has been the cause of many hurt feelings, maybe even betrayal,” Eckern said in a written statement. “I chose to act upon my belief that the traditional definition of marriage should be preserved.”

On the one hand, I understand the outrage. It’s one thing to work closely with someone whose views on the capital gains tax are different from your own. It’s another thing to ask a gay or lesbian person to give time and energy to an organization led by a man who believes, deep in his heart and in his wallet, that your relationship is not deserving of the same fundamental awe, reverence, and societal approbation as his own. When it comes to mounting a stage production, it is perhaps deeply unreasonable to ask a gay or lesbian artist or actor to devote time and energy to working in the close, intimate proximity of the theater world with someone whose time and money goes to causes so fundamentally hostile to one’s very identity. It’s all very well for heterosexuals to protest that a belief in traditional marriage ought not to be misinterpreted as private animus to gays and lesbians — but the reality is that intent is at best only half of the truth. Perception is the other half, and it is not an unreasonable perception that those who voted “Yes” on Proposition 8 are unwilling to embrace gay and lesbian relationships as fundamentally equal. It’s also not unreasonable to expect gay and lesbian artists to be unwilling to devote time, talent, and treasure to supporting a theater whose artistic director — no matter how kind, hardworking, and talented he may be — uses his salary (derived in no small part from gay and lesbian labor) to support a cause so fundamentally inimical to their most basic human interests.
Continue reading

Sick

I’m fighting off the flu — three days before the Pasadena Marathon, which I still hope to run. Posting returns soon.

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged

Thursday Short Poem: Cooper’s “Puritan Impulse”

Wyn Cooper’s fine poem misreads the Puritans, who were less joy-denying than we often imagine (ask any historian of seventeenth-century America). But there are the Puritans, who are misunderstood, and then the “puritanical impulse”, which, stripped of its historical and theological specifics, describes a distrust of pleasure — and even, at worst, a kind of pleasure in denying pleasure. I guard against this as best I can.

Puritan Impulse

I talk the least
of what I covet
most, seldom look
at what I wish to see,
turn my nose away
from what smells best,
refuse to listen
to my favorite opera,
La Traviata,
even when it’s sung
in town for free.
The Van Gogh show
can’t make me walk
the block to view it,
no chef can intuit
what I might want,
and handing me jars
of caviar while
popping Veuve Cliquot
is not what I call love.

The rain last night
froze on the birches,
and today they bend
almost to breaking.
The sun makes every
branch distinct, too bright
to look at for long.
And that’s excuse

enough for me
to look back down
to the road
I walk on, ice
on the pavement
so clear it’s blue.

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged

Gay sports update again

Folks know my theory that legalizing gay marriage is good for winning championships. One of many small disappointments contained within the Great Disappointment which was the narrow defeat for marriage equality in California is what it will mean for California-based sports teams in the year to come. The USC Trojans will not end up playing for the national title in football, and my beloved Cal Golden Bears women’s basketball team will likely not win the NCAA crown. If the California Supreme Court rules Prop 8 unconstitutional, however, there’s still time to reverse these inevitable setbacks.

But hey, Connecticut just legalized gay marriage, and the first weddings were performed today. And guess who has the number #1 team in women’s hoops? Yup, UConn, led by coach Geno Auriemma and super soph Maya Moore. They haven’t won a title in a few years, but I suspect that they’ll collect a sixth in April. They can thank their state supreme court if they do.

Colleges and Crisis Pregnancy Centers: troubling signs of an alliance

The new Ms. Magazine is on the shelves. The feature article (only a preview is available for free online — please subscribe) is on the disturbing growth in the number of college health centers who refer pregnant students (or those who think they might be pregnant) to CPCs: “crisis pregnancy centers.” Crisis Pregnancy Centers, funded by churches and, increasingly, by the federal government, are in the business of preventing abortion by counseling pregnant women and girls to carry to term. They rarely, if ever, offer the same panoply of health care options that might be found at, say, a Planned Parenthood clinic.

A survey conducted this past summer by the Feminist Majority Foundation, publisher of Ms., found that of 398 campus health centers at four-year colleges that responded to a questionnaire, 48 percent routinely refer women who think they might be pregnant to CPCs. Although 81 percent also refer women to full-service health clinics, some campus centers say they want to give students “all of the options,” as one health-center director put it.

But CPCs don’t offer all the options; rather, they push the unsuspecting young women who walk through their doors to keep the pregnancy. They often push dubious, or even long-since debunked statistics about the correlation between abortion and suicide, depression, breast cancer, and difficult conceiving future children. While health-care providers are required by state law and the Hippocratic oath to put the well-being of the patient first, CPCs follow a mandate to protect only one entity, the “pre-born baby” growing inside the body of a woman whose own needs are of, at best, secondary concern. Indeed, other than providing anti-abortion counseling, there’s very little that CPCs can offer:

19 year-old Nina Lopez, a student at nearby Santa Monica College, encountered CPC tactics first-hand:

“Even before I found out I wasn’t pregnant, the counselor said I should abstain from
sex,” says Lopez. She picked up a fact sheet on “post-abortion stress” and was asked to fill
out a form that sought nonmedical information about her family and her religious beliefs.
And then, when her urine test revealed not a pregnancy but a possible urinary tract infection,
the center did not offer her any medical treatment or refer her elsewhere.

College health clinics who refer students to CPCs thus put their clients’ health at risk. All medical providers have an obligation to either provide necessary care, or to refer to another provider who can provide that care. Nina Lopez’s UTI was not of interest to the CPCs, however, so she received neither care nor a referral. The fault lies as much with the college health department that referred her as with the CPC itself. Continue reading

Pleasure, Prophylaxis, Procreation: more on “jumping the life to come” and unintended pregnancy

This post two weeks ago about contraception and adolescent risk-taking sparked some rather heated discussion. In an effort to shed light rather than merely generate heat, reader Kate sent me an article (not available online, she sent the PDF): Pleasure, Prophylaxis and Procreation:
A Qualitative Analysis of Intermittent Contraceptive Use
And Unintended Pregnancy
, which appears in the September 2008 issue of Perspectives on Sexual and Reproductive Health.

The study looks at what the authors call “pregnancy ambivalence”. It hasn’t been studied before:

Indeed, reflecting the field’s general neglect of the
role of sexuality in reproductive behaviors, few researchers
have examined whether unprotected sex or
ambivalence about pregnancy may heighten the sexual
experience, or whether the romantic notion of creating
a child with someone may deter the use of contraceptives.
We know little about the emotional, physical
and cognitive states that contribute to situations in
which lack of contraceptive use is pleasurable or purposeful
to women and men.

The study makes clear that the availability of safe and legal abortion has little bearing on the decision couples make to “spontaneously” avoid the use of contraception. Indeed, the idea of abortion as a “back-up” is never mentioned in the study. Rather, the triggers for intermittent contraceptive use, in addition to the phenomenon of “pregnancy ambivalence”, are three distinct types of pleasure both women and men may derive from unprotected intercourse:

1. Active eroticization of pregnancy risk. The least common
but most direct articulation of the pleasures of pregnancy
ambivalence took form in the eroticization of pregnancy
risk. In these cases, participants described increased
sexual arousal at the prospect of conception.

2. Passive romanticization of procreation. In many cases,
ambivalence manifested not as heat-of-the-moment
arousal, but as a less dramatic romanticization of the
general idea of a pregnancy with a particular partner.
Certain respondents flirted with pregnancy in the form of
a subtle romantic fantasy that also contributed to intermittent
use or non-use of contraceptives. While these
respondents did not actively intend to conceive, they did
not stringently avoid pregnancy, either.

3. Escapist pleasures. Even when they were not planning
or hoping for a baby, several respondents came to
embrace an unintended pregnancy as a way to foster
a relationship, cultivate a new family and potentially
escape the hardships of their lives. Not surprisingly, only
less socially advantaged women—especially those who
had become pregnant at a young age—described this
phenomenon. Pregnancies represented temporary hopes
that things would get better and that their unborn
children would enjoy brighter futures.
Continue reading

Veteran’s Day

It’s Veteran’s Day, and I’ve got a great many things to do on this day off, blogging not one of them. (And I like the use of the possessive to describe the day – and yeah, I know it’s not the official way.)

In regards to the holiday itself: I am not a veteran of the armed services. Few in my family are. But in my capacity as a teacher, I’ve known veterans of every conflict since World War Two. In many of my evening courses, it’s not uncommon to have older students taking classes “for pleasure’. Though I haven’t had a WWII vet in class in a decade or more, I had several take my course in my first few years at Pasadena City College. My mother, who taught for nearly thirty years at Monterey Peninsula College, recalls having had a few older students who were First World War veterans when she was first teaching. Today, I have at least a dozen young people who served in Iraq or Afghanistan enrolled. My veterans tend to be excellent students, with the work habits one might expect to see.

I teach the build-up to World War One in my modern European history course; indeed, the Great War remains the topic that generates the most interest among students in that class. Though their numbers have dwindled to a precious few — so few that I can name most of them — I am struck that on this 90th anniversary of Armistice Day, a handful of Great War veterans are still alive. Frank Buckles is the last surviving US combat veteran; he is 107. Harry Patch and Henry Allingham (110 and 112 respectively) are the last two British combat veterans; Patch, along with Fernand Goux of France, are the last living persons to have fought in the trenches. I am awed by their longevity, and by the hand of fate that took so many millions of young men – and chose a select few of their comrades to live in three separate centuries.

May this Armistice Day not be their last.

Poet Laureate Andrew Motion’s Five Acts of Harry Patch is very fine. My favorite bit:

…life is like that now, suddenly and gradually
everyone you know dies and still comes to visit
or you head back to them, it’s not clear which…

Posted in Uncategorized | Tagged

The crowded “cloud of witnesses”: of ex-lovers, ex-wives, and the call to grow

After ten days of “all election, all the time” posting, I’m ready for something different.

I’ve got a remarkable number of friends going through divorces or break-ups right now. And a week or so ago, one of those friends asked me a question I often get: “How did you survive three divorces?” The question is usually half-facetious, half-serious. I have the quick and facetious answer down pat: “I’m the King of Starting Over”, something I’ve blogged about in the past. I know better than most how to move out of a shared space and begin a new life with rented furniture! Three divorces before my 36th birthday (still, and one hopes always, a standing family record) have given me a great many interesting stories about “new beginnings”.

But last week, my friend asked me a question I get far more rarely: “How, Hugo, do you deal with having been in love with so many women? Where do they all ‘go’ in your head and your heart?” My friend is an evangelical cradle Christian; his soon-to-be-ex wife was his first love and his first lover. He can’t imagine ever being as intimate with anyone in the future as he was with her. He’s worried that memories of his first marriage, and his first romance, will haunt any future relationship. He repeated his question: “Where do all these past lovers ‘go’?”

There’s a great line in Jane Hamilton’s otherwise over-wrought A Map of the World (which was turned into an underrated Sigourney Weaver/David Strathairn film). I don’t have the book or the movie handy, so I’ll quote it as I remember. Near the end, the lead character (who has gone through unspeakable tragedy piled on unspeakable tragedy) says of her past loves: “They’re always with you, just not consciously. They’re right beneath the eyelids.” I may be misquoting the line, but the point is reasonably clear: the past is something you heal from, something you get over, but also something you carry with you. And the lovers and exes whose bodies you knew and whose lives you shared are gone — and in some sense, need to be gone — but their influence on your own life continues.

One of the Apostle’s loveliest images is of a “cloud of witnesses” urging us on. Whatever St. Paul meant, I’ve long cherished the idea that I am watched over, and perhaps in some sense even protected, by those who have gone before. I think of my father, my grandparents, and countless other friends and relatives who have “gone to join the great majority” on the other side. As a Christian, I believe not only in a life to come but also in the promise of being reunited with deceased loved ones. I also believe, based on Scripture and on hope, that I am watched over and cared for by these witnesses. I’m not practicing some sort of ancestor worship, never fear — but though my great hope is in Jesus, my quiet comfort is also in the presence of those who cheer me on. (I know this isn’t a comforting image for everyone. I had a friend who was raised with the belief that the dead could see you, and she grew up with a genuine phobia about going to the toilet, worried that dead people were going to watch her poop.)

In any case, I don’t just apply the “cloud of witnesses” image to the dead. Continue reading

In defense of the “feminist” label

When “Mermade”, who blogs now at “The Bitten Apple”, first took my class, she was a dedicated young Catholic conservative. She is something else today, and I can only take the tiniest smidgen of credit for it — an intro to women’s studies class can open a door, but not everyone walks through it. Mermade walked through that door and has gone on her own remarkable journey since. You should be reading her blog regularly, but her post today — in defense of the label “feminist” — is the sort that makes me proud and humbled.