Fun with Myers-Briggs

This Myers-Briggs Dating Field Guide has been floating around the ‘net, and I thought it rather fine. But as an ENFP (who occasionally feels rather INFP) married to a strong ESTP, this was a bit disconcerting:

Why you want one: Know Jeremy Piven in Entourage? Sometimes it just feels good to be around an asshole.
Spoiler Alert: Followed to its logical conclusion, this personality type can also be called ‘sociopathic.’
Where to find one: The clubbiest of clubs, near edge of the dancefloor where they’re looking to shove their tongue down someones throat for awhile and then have some aggressive sex before they leave without saying anything.
Pickup technique: Maybe the easiest to pickup, just try to look good and get in their line of vision. Be aggressive.

Honey, is that you? We do call my wife Herschel, as I explained here…

Why you want one: Passionate, unpredictable, absolutely always interesting.
Spoiler Alert: Not loyal to people or ideologies. One day it’s yoga, the next it’s kickboxing. One day it’s Theravada Buddhism, the next it’s Assemblies of God. This applies to their romantic life.
Where to find one: The clubbiest of clubs, in the middle of the dancefloor, possibly on X.
Pickup technique: Wear some bright colors, talk about how you bathed in the Ganges to get salvation, give them drugs, promise to get tantric. Beware of passionate yet very sloppy kisses.

Hah. I actually was in Assemblies of God for five minutes. And yeah, that’s probably my kissing technique too.

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12 thoughts on “Fun with Myers-Briggs

  1. hahaha

    Hardly sounds like a match made in heaven…

    ………………………………………which means you’ll probably stay married until death and all that. 😀

    Never underestimate “interesting and confounding” in ones life partner. :)

  2. Heeeee.

    “Oblivious miser” is my favorite epithet in all the world. I’m going to have it engraved on my tombstone.

    (And did you notice how it took me absolutely no time at all to get around to talking about myself, not about you? It’s not always a mistake to conform to a stereotype. At least then the other folks know what to expect.)

    “Figure out what they’re interested in and make insightful comments”…someone who’s better at jokes than I am ought to be able to make use of this. I dangle it like bait, not knowing what to do with it myself.

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  4. We did this a few years back. It told us that a possible career path for my husband is becoming a hit-man and that I was likely to go to any lengths for a cause that I believed in, including self-immolation. So we are a stone-cold sniper and a fiery martyr?

  5. Me:


    Why you want one: It’s kind of intoxicating to be around someone this smart and serious. It’s really sexy for as long as you can go without getting any affirmation that they like you back.

    Where to find one: Home alone, reading something really interesting, generally not giving a fuck.

    Pickup technique: Figure out what they’re interested in and make insightful comments. Don’t expect any acknowledgment that they heard you.

    Scarily accurate. 😀

  6. Another INTJ here…but I have always thought systems like that don’t really fit me and a lot of others. There’s always something that sticks out, or is missing. I like to think I let my friends know I value their companionship, and I do sometimes wish I had a couple more friends. And I am in fact quite emotional, but it is usually more about things/ideas than people, and I don’t always show it a whole lot.
    So it’s a good thing for all that I’m asexual/unromantic.
    I don’t suppose the perfect psych typing/classification system will ever be devised.

  7. Some of this is scarily accurate. I’m an INFP.

    Pickup technique: Say you think care ethics is an overlooked school of thought or that you ‘really resonate’ with Joni Mitchell or anything else deep + nice sounding.

    I went through a period where I listened to Joni Mitchell songs… over and over and over, much to my then roomates’ chagrin.

  8. As someone who’s only squarely in the P category (the others are pretty much tipped on the edge) I’m not sure what I should be 😛 (Probably currently flip flopping around ENFP and ESFP)

    In other words: I think having only 8 types of people in the world is boring.

  9. Jay, there are actually 16 types, but that is a bit limiting.

    And yeah, we do flip around. I’m a very strong NF, a fairly strong P, but my E and my I fluctuate enormously.

  10. INTP-
    Why you want one: They’re really smart (er, no…) and make up for being awkward + not really sexy (accurate) by having a lot of interesting things to say. (…in theory, kind of?)
    Spoiler Alert: You’ll get tired of them making jokes about ninjas and Lord of the Rings. (hell, I get tired of me doing that) Probable addiction to World of Warcraft. (bah, monthly fees are for suckers)
    Where to find one: At their friend’s house drinking whiskey Cokes and watching Shark Week on the Discovery Channel. (Coke is an abomination. Otherwise accurate.)
    Pickup technique: Wear something slutty + talk about science/robots/the singularity. (yep)

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