My column at Jezebel is now called “Genderal Interest”, and today’s piece is “It’s Not Your Fault You’re a Mean Girl.” Excerpt:
The fewer genuinely good men there are, the greater the bargaining power they have in relationship — and the more concessions women (at least those who are eager for marriage) are told they must make. Since so many successful women want to draw from the ever-shrinking pool of genuinely attractive and functional dudes, rivalry (or so we’re reminded) must be inevitable.
Endless concessions are a recipe for disappointment; perfectionism a guarantor of exhaustion. Both are consequences of the scarcity model. But perhaps the most painful repercussion is the alienation that comes from competition. For young women in particular — including a great many of my students who have nothing to do with the modeling business — the pressure to compete with other women seems to be worsening. Blame the economy; blame the growing dude deficit on college campuses; blame women for their own success — the side-effect is always that for too many, the real scarcity is of close, uncompetitive female friendship of the sort that can rejoice unequivocally in another’s triumph.
Firstly I am a strong supporter of most of your views, and I am not criticising the core thrust of your article, that society lets men get away with being useless, and this hurts women. However I would question a statement that you made about college admissions.
You said that “our culture lets men into college with lower grades than their sisters.” Is this true when Physics, Chemistry, Engineering and Maths are included?
I attended an elite college which specialised in Science, Maths and Engineering. They did everything they could think of to get women to apply, and no matter what they do they can’t get the same number of female applicants, so the gender ratio’s are dramatically unequal. For example the mechanical engineering course has about 150 people per year. In my year 2 of those 150 were female. The college as a whole is 70% male.
Firstly, could the real problem be that young women are applying to the humanities, and therefore flooding some institutions with good female applicants, while leaving a drought of good female applications in the sciences, maths and engineering?
Secondly is there a study that compares offers given to male and female applicants across a wide variety of subjects, which could would then allow you to say conclusively that “our culture lets men into college with lower grades than their sisters.”
John…shush…you’re letting the cat out of the bag.